All You Need is Love

Last week one of our neighbors passed away.  Terry was good friend and a good man who was taken very quickly by cancer.  In a little over two months he developed an inoperable tumor that resisted any type of treatment and left him in horrible pain.  It's a terrible loss but I'm glad that he is no longer in pain and is at peace.

Terry is the first friend I made when I moved into this neighborhood.  He was a one man neighborhood watch and he really did take care of me.  He questioned anyone that stopped by my house.  When he hadn't seen me for a few days he  would come knocking on my door to make sure I was okay.  We helped each other thru times when we were struggling and celebrated good times together.  I miss his laugh and his stories about his younger days.  And I miss the kids he would shove my way who were really interested in going to college.  He would sit in on our talks and if he didn't think the kid was serious he'd tell them to get the hell off my porch and quit wasting my time.  But the ones who were serious came back again and again.  I helped them fill out applications and thru the financial aid office.  When a couple of them were accepted to college we all celebrated together and Terry was the hero because he pushed their sorry butts because he knew that they could do more and that they could get out of this town.

Terry was by no means a saint, but over the past nine months or so we had a lot of talks centered around viewing life and how to live it.  Years ago he had a massive heart attack and basically had his heart rebuilt from various veins in his body.  He's been on disability for years.  His heart doctor told him that it was time for surgery again as his heart was only working at 30% capacity.  This was months before his cancer diagnosis.  Maybe that's why he became so reflective about life.

We both came to the conclusion that really what life boils down to is love.  Loving your fellow man.  Loving and forgiving, two of the hardest things to do, but both essential.  And you can do both and have it reconciled in your heart or even let the person know, but they don't have to believe you.  That's okay.  People are skeptical.  They always think you have an angle or that you want something. But maybe if the world could see it as Terry did, and as I'm trying to, things would be simpler.

Squishyness!

Winter has definitely arrived.  Woo hoo!!  We had our first snow of the season over the weekend.  Nothing major, just enough to cover the trees and the ground.  I love winter and it always puts me in the mood for knitting.  So recently I went to Barnes and Noble and got some books and then hit up the yarn shop in Ligonier.

The first book I got was  November Knits.

 So I could make this cardigan.

Out of this awesome squishy yarn.

Then I got the book Joy of Sox. 

 I love hand knit socks!  Can't wait to make these knee highs.

Out of this squishy yarn.  I love the colors here.

The final book is Weekend Hats.  I'm making two hats.

 Here's the yarn for the ripple hat.

And I've already started the hat on the cover.

Out of this Malabrigo yarn.

This is the first year I won't be knitting any gifts for Christmas.  Of course I say this now but we still have 30 days until Christmas.

Aloha, Friend

Our dear friend Ben flew back to Hawaii on Sunday after a month long visit.  We were sad to see him go but so happy to have a month with him.  Phone calls and text messages just don't cut it once you get to see one of your best friends in person.  PLUS ukelele serenades are pretty cool.

Of course now we no longer get to snicker at complaints about the cold.  No, it's back to hearing about the glorious warm weather and sunny skies.  Recording local musicians, great coffee, and jam sessions on the beach.

But then I can't be too jealous.  I'm sure I'll rub it in plenty when we visit him in the new year.  Love you Ben!

It's Hard to Pick A Favorite

We got our wedding photos from the photographer today.  This photo is definitely at the top of my list of favorites.

Our niece NatNat can definitely ham it up when asked.  Now we just need to go through the 3000+ photos, pick what we want, then get them printed.  It's nice owning every photo and not having to pay the photographer more for printing.

Once the evil side affects pass I'll be back to posting regular creative stuff.  The past week has been rough as expected but happily the internet never fails to entertain.  Thanks for the tips y'all!

Oh, You Again

The week before my wedding I had an unscheduled visit with my neurologist because of the latest, and most painful, effect I've had from MS.  Banding.  Also known as Girding.  Or the MS Hug.  It happens when the muscles between your ribs go into spasms.  It feels like someone is twisting your ribs in the front while crushing them in the back.  All the while they're sticking a knife upwards in your sternum.

Banding is just one of the many effects that can happen when you have lesions in your spine.  Neurologists are pretty well versed when it comes to what part of your body is going to get hammered when it comes to the brain and cervical spine.  The lumbar spine is another story.  So far I have Lhermitte's Sign which is an electric shock sensation that travels down the spine and arms and is associated with movement of the neck.  Banding is my latest lumbar lesion hell.  Plus the lesions don't even have to be active.  They just have to move along with the spinal column.

I started getting banding over a year ago but then it was just pressure around my ribs.  While it was uncomfortable it wasn't really painful.  Then I started getting sharp pains that would last about an hour.  This would happen every three months or so.  Over the past two months I've been getting banding consistently every week, many times two to three times a week.  This past month often the banding lasted 10 hours.  Ten hours of excruciating pain where it is impossible to get comfortable.  I will pace for hours.  My breathing will become so shallow that often I've come close to passing out.  I've researched various methods other patients have used (heating pads, massage, hot baths, etc.) but even they have met with little success.  Neither did I.

My neuro has me on the highest dosage of the muscle relaxer prescribed for MS.  She increased my dosage of another medication I take for muscle spasms but that hasn't helped.  So last night after another 10 hour bout of banding I went in for my usual MS infusion and told the nurse about my talk with Kelly and that I wanted to start the IV steroids whenever she was ready to.  I figured it wouldn't happen until next week after my usual six month MRIs.  HA!

Johnna came in after talking to the neuro and told me that after my infusion was done I'd get my first round of IV steroids today with a second round tomorrow.  Though I was shocked I was also relieved.  And petrified.  I don't have a very good history of handling IV steroids well.  If fact I'm allergic to them but not in a life threatening way.  More in a week or two of misery way.  As in it hurts to even touch my skin.  But really?  At this point I DON'T CARE.  I will try ANYTHING to make the banding go away.

Plus I got to come home with my spiffy IV all ready for tomorrow.

Hey.  When you are a crappy stick dealing with an overnight IV is no biggie.  Plus I've been thru this at least 10 times so this is nothing.  It's also a great way to get your amazing husband to wash your hair and massage your head to the point where you're on the verge of falling asleep.  HEAVEN.

This is Charlie's first experience with me coming home attached to medical equipment.  It's an unexpected and ugly sight to see.  But his first reaction was to pull me in his arms and just hold me because he knows it isn't easy.  But this time it will be easier because it isn't just me going thru it.  It's us.  I already know it won't be as bad as other times because he's always there not just for me to lean on, but MAKING me lean on him.  And that is love I've never known and for which I am so grateful.

And Then Two Became One

Wedding mania is over, except really there wasn't anything manic about it.  Everything went off without a hitch.  We were officially married on October 19th at the courthouse.  It was a simple and lovely ceremony.  I'm glad that my sister sent us a few pics.

Everything about it felt right.  I wasn't nervous at all.  I knew and know Charlie is exactly the person I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with and that's an amazing and comforting feeling.  After the ceremony and pictures with our awesome photographer we all went out for a great dinner.  Both my family and Charlie's get along so well.  My parents and Charlie's mom graduated together, so there's a lot of history.  Our nieces kept everyone in hysterics and I definitely teared up the first time they called me Aunt Sabrina.  Adorable.

The next day was the big reception and what a party!  Everyone who RSVP'd was there.  It was a packed house.  And there was a lot of dancing.  The biggest hit of the night though was the photobooth.  Over 500 pictures were taken.  Here are just a few.

The props were a big hit.  It was great because the booth printed two copies of the photos so guests got to keep one copy and the other went into a photo album for Charlie and I.  It's a great blackmail tool keepsake.

A few words about the two guys in the last picture.  Both are great friends.  The one on the right is my best friend and man of honor who did a great job with the usual holding flowers, train adjustment, etc.  But both he and Brad, the dude on the left, have been friends with me for 12 years and were there when I was first diagnosed with MS.  They've been there and know about every change and progression of the disease.  (Well, the TRUE ones.  Apparently there was a rumor circulating that at one point I wasn't able to even "wipe my own ass."  I'm glad to say that's a fabrication.  I sure as hell have no idea who would have done it for me!)

So throughout the night both Chambers and Brad did the additional check ins to see if I needed a break or if I had taken my meds or if I was overheated.  Or did I require an Asti break.  It's great having friends that know you so well and vice versa.

As a result of Chambers' usual charm, my aunt's are all in love with him.  To which my response was DUH.

Something Blue

Sure, they may just seem like fancy shoes...

Until you turn them over.

It's the Final Countdown

And so we are now officially in Happy Get Marry! month.  Behold!  The bouquet and boutonniere!

Now that we're getting down to the wire I figured that it's the perfect time to start knitting a shawl for the reception.  Because who doesn't love pressure?

In Which I May Be A Book Snob

I was at Barnes & Noble today renewing my membership and grabbing a cup of coffee.  As I waited for my latte a woman came up to the Starbucks counter and asked to pay for her book and magazine.  I noticed she was purchasing The Perks of Being A Wallflower.  I told her how much I love the book and she told me that she had just watched the movie and loved it so much she decided to buy the book.  I mentioned that I loved the book so much that I planned to never watch the movie.  She told me that was crazy!  The movie was so great!  I told her she was crazy!  There's no way the movie will ever compete with the book!  She told me the music was wonderful!  I told her I know!!  One of the characters in the book makes a playlist so I already know the music!  In fact the friend who recommended I read the book made CDs of the playlist for all of us who were interested!  And this was back in 2004!

Personally I have a love/hate relationship with movies based on books.  Nine times out of ten I have no problem with it.  But then there are those books I absolutely love that when I find out they're being made into a movie I start plotting ways to sabotage production.  Like The Time Traveler's Wife.  When I learned it was being made into a movie I felt such rage.  How???  How could such an intricate story translate to film?  It couldn't.  I went to great lengths avoiding any glimpse of the movie with great success until one afternoon when I was confined to the couch, mindlessly flipping through t.v. channels.  And there it was.  The film version of The Time Traveler's Wife.  I watched 10 minutes of it.  Ten terrible minutes watching Rachel McAdams butcher the role.  Rachel McAdams whose best scene ever in a film was when she died in the second Sherlock Holmes film.  Augh!!!

I read a lot.  And usually if I know I'm going to see a movie that's based on a book I'll read the book first.  Like Cloud Atlas.  Charlie and I are planning to see it and both have read it, so it will be interesting to see how it translates to screen.  Same goes with television series.  The HBO series Game of Thrones  is based on George R.R. Martin's book series A Song of Ice and Fire.  There are SIX BOOKS in that series.  SIX!  And dear old George always looks pretty close to death so it's a good thing he's told HBO how he's planned for the book series to end since he probably won't be around to finish out the books.  I mean there were six years between the publications of books five and six.

And then there are the really, really popular books/series that I read just to find out what all the fuss is about.  The Twilight series.  The Hunger Games series.  The 50 Shades series.  I make fun of them all but I can!  I can because I actually read them!  Look, I view them the same way I view voting.  If you don't vote then really?  You don't get to complain for the next four years.  So if you didn't read the books the same rules apply.  Do the grunt work people, no matter how painful and I.Q. dimming it is.

Mama Gunn

Hey, remember the jacket?

Yeah I would have loved to forget about it too.  Everything was going along great.  At the end of this post I had the front and back together.  The pockets were even lined.  Everything was going great until I got the the part where I had to connect the back facing and collar and lining and wha???  Mind you these are all things that I've done before but for some reason I just couldn't wrap my head around the pattern instructions.  On closer look at the pattern I realized the company that manufactures this particular coat pattern is Simplicity.  What a deceptive name for a pattern company.  Their methods for assembling garments are idiotic.  It took a collective brain trust led by my personal Tim Gunn (my mom, she who can "make it work") to finally get everything sorted out with the facing.  After that I finished the jacket with no problems.

As you can see I'm particularly proud of the lining.  So much so in fact that I neglected to take a picture of the RIGHT SIDE of the finished jacket.  I'll be sure to get a picture once I start wearing it which should be soon since autumn has finally arrived.  Hallelujah!  Like many people this is my favorite season and there's no place better to enjoy it than the northeastern part of the U.S.  I love living here.

After finishing the jacket I started making a dress and was once again stumped when I started working on the collar.  Guess what?  It was another Simplicity pattern.  NEVER AGAIN.  My sewing mojo is currently on hiatus so I have no idea what I'll be working on next, except for a commissioned piece.  And Happy Get Marry.  And House Hunting.

Knowing You're Over It

Bachelorette weekend was a blast.  It was lovely to finally be able to connect faces with names I've been hearing for six years.  We stayed at a Bed and Breakfast in Old City which I was hoping was haunted.  Actually, I'm pretty sure it was haunted because the key to our room would only work for Chambers.  Spirits, I tell you!  Spirits!

We had an amazing dinner at Cochon followed by a night out with the boys.  We'd spent the day just walking around the city enjoying the gorgeous weather.  It was surreal walking blocks I had walked most days for four years.  And the caliber of the homeless has improved.  One man asked me for change and promised to pay me back.  How nice of him.  You don't hear that everyday from a panhandler.

Sunday was spent shopping at the mecca known as King of Prussia, dinner for eight at Max Brenner (chocolate martini anyone?) then out again with the boys.  That was when things got interesting.  We found out that my best friend's ex was at the bar we first planned to go to so we went somewhere else.  Personally I would have loved the opportunity to smack his ex (I promised to use an open hand!) but really?  It wasn't worth it.

See, the person who gave us the heads up told us the ex was wasted and had just learned my bff had defriended him on Facebook and he wanted to know why.  The dude is none too observant because this defriending happened A YEAR AND A HALF AGO.  Really?  Really???  Wow.  Look, Facebook is a nice way to stay connected but that's taking it way too seriously. 

We were talking about the situation and my friend was saying that yes, the ex is rather demented but if he hadn't had the relationship he wouldn't have met a lot of the people he's close friends with today.  And that, my friends, is a classic case of knowing you're over someone.  When you can look back at ended relationships, whether they be romantic or platonic, and see the good that came out of it, you know that you're well and truly over it.

It's a really nice place to be.  I've been thinking about it ever since it happened on Sunday.  Thinking about past friendships and relationships and genuinely hoping that the person in each situation is happy.  Because EVERYONE deserves to be happy.  And if they couldn't find happiness with me, then I genuinely hope they are or were able to find the happiness they deserve with someone else.  Holding grudges is pointless.  It's EXHAUSTING.  Sure it takes time to get over things and there's no timetable dictating when you should be over something or someone.  But eventually you have to let it go.  Because, as we say,  everyone deserves La La Land.  Their own happy ending.  Probably you won't know if it ever happens for them but you can always hope.

Bachelorette It Up

Happy Get Marry! is in full swing here.  I'm so happy to report that the mother of the groom and mother of the bride have purchased their dresses.  Catastrophe diverted.

This weekend is party weekend with my Witness.  Or Man of Honor if you will.  My BFF.  My Bestie.  Use whatever vernacular you want, it makes no difference.  I'll be meeting up with my best friend in Philly to celebrate and I can't.  freaking. wait.  Its been six years since I worked in Philly and I haven't been back since I left.  In the intervening years I've said many times that I'd visit, but it never happened.  Life, you know.  And its been months (a year?) since I've seen my best friend and I'm so excited to see him.  Twelve years have passed since we met at the beginning of grad school.  I'm pretty sure he's gotten over his initial hatred of me because I had walking pnuemonia when we started an epic assignment.  Of course I got over my initial judgement of him as a slacker because I had my parts of the project done when he didn't.  But then we bonded when we found out we had a mutual opinion of the third party in our assignment.  I have no idea how to handle seeing him TWO MONTHS IN A ROW.  Swoon.

So this weekend will be packed with friends and celebration.  Plus a swanky hotel stay and I'm sure a ton of reminiscing.  It's funny where life takes you and the people you meet along the way who come along on the ride.  That jumping on and off of their rail car which you can miss for months but once you're aboard it feels like you never stepped off.  And going to a city that has changed but hasn't and going to old familiar haunts as well as new ones that I know will be comfortable as well.  Because it's more about the company you keep than where you keep it.  And I will be in the best company.  And for once I'll be the one traveling the greater distance, though he does have to endure the drive up from D.C.

Though we aren't shopping for a Maid of Honor dress.  There's no way that b***h is going to look better than me.  :)

Happy Get Marry!

My favorite engagement congratulations card came from Charlie's nieces.  The eldest started her message off with, "Dear Uncle Charlie and Future Aunt Sabrina." She also included drawings of us clearly labeled with the initials U.C. For Uncle Charlie and F.A.S. for Future Aunt Sabrina.  In her illustration we're both blondes with blue eyes but hey, sometimes you just have to work with what Crayola gives you.

The younger niece drew us a picture and wrote us a note which was translated by her mom.  It said, "Happy Get Marry!" much like Happy Birthday.  We've been saying that randomly to each other ever since.  "Happy Get Marry!" Happy indeed.  This is also the niece who should be the poster child for what can happen when a child has too much sugar.  We were at an event and there were cookies.  She was told to only take two but I'm pretty sure she had a few more.  This led to an impromptu serenade from behind a chair.  It went like this:

Sabrina is...a pillow!
Sabrina is...a squaw!
Sabrina is...a handle!
Sabrina is...a headlight!
Sabrina is...a backpack!
Sabrina is...everything!
Sabrina is...MEEEEEEEE!

That's the abridged version.  Hers went on A LOT longer.  It was hilarious.  She needs her own floor show.

Olympics Junkie

I know I'm not the only one who loves the Olympics.  It's addictive.  But I have no patience for waiting until prime time to watch events that are taking place in real time.  Seriously NBC, do you really think that people don't find out the results of events BEFORE you air them?  Also, WHY IS RYAN SEACREST A COMMENTATOR??  Holy crap he's everywhere.  Then you have Bob Costas who is insufferable and Matt Lauer who was really rude during the opening ceremonies and voila!  As my friend called it you have the d-bag trifecta!  Good job, NBC.  End rant.

Jacket progress.  Corduroy!

Check out the pockets.  WHICH ARE LINED.  This is the first garment that I've lined the correct way, not as an afterthought.  Yes you are looking at a green jacket with purple lining.  Complimentary colors, people!  Just wait til we get to the next post.  I really have to call on my personal Tim Gunn for the next round.

Giddy

I fully expected to be in wedding decorations mode at this point but guess what?  I don't have to worry about it anymore!  A professional stepped up and offered her event planning/decorating service for free.  FOR FREE.  There is a theme!  And a color scheme!  And I don't have to worry about setting anything up or taking anything down because she and her team do it all!  Lucky, lucky us.

Hey I started a jacket for fall.  It's going to look like this.

But first we prototype it.

And then the fun begins.  Corduroy, yo.  Bring.  It.